The election was a one-sided bloodletting affair, with the democratic party suffering it’s greatest defeat in history, effectively ending two-party politics in America for the time being. Due to the silicon dilemma still terrorizing the nation and globe, election results took months of chaotic and patience testing toil for the tabulators to tabulate. By this time though improvements had been made to modes of communication across the land, resulting in the easing of some of the problems brought on by the ongoing crisis. Landline phones were up and running, while schools were frantically educating students in vacuum tube technology. The just sworn-in President began his inaugural address, standing behind a podium at the US Capital, a record-breaking crowd of listeners awaiting his words. The public address system utilized vintage tube amplifiers donated by excited and patriotic audiophiles.
“My fellow Americans, though the past year might have seemed an endless tightrope taut with peril and injustice for all, we are on the mend. We’ve joined together in unity and are well on our way to flourishing again as a nation, the greatest nation there is, has been, and shall ever be. We are great again!” The crowd lost it at those words and the charged atmosphere was reminicent of a Nuremberg Rally of olden times. The grinning President pumped his fists and preened appropriately in response to the adoration of the mob before him. “With your help I beat two unfair impeachments, the theft and fraud perpetrated against me in the 2020 election, a phony insurrection accusation and sham trial, inept and specious machinations of the suits and skirts in our justice department, and all manner of spiteful and unkind behavior on the part of the wokey wokey establishment. The deep state of mediocrity, incompetence, and the rot inherent in the democratic party and it’s minions and minders, enabled our victory. But here I am again, a phoenix risen, empowered and driven, laser-focused on helping America prosper and heal after these difficult times.” The crowd by now was mesmerized and silent, more than a few listeners sobbing for joy.
“We have much work to do. In spite of the hurtful slanders of the media, now thankfully de-fanged and castrated, my message was heard and taken to heart by 80 percent of the voters, who were still traumatized by the timely arrival of the silicon disaster, an almighty delivered sucker-punch to the maurauding masses of whining, and if I might be candid, pitifully weak and wokey wokey liberal scourge. This is our mandate to implement our vision of an all made equal and fair model of society.” The crowd rose and roared approval at those words. The New York Times, just recently able to print again after press machine modifications, ran the headline, “The Don Is Back!” in triple boldface.
The chief government researcher wasted no time in hatching a scheme to utilize Blunote for the common good. Workshops were appearing throughout the land, where eager workers were modifying computers, smartphones, and other disabled processor-based devices. The modified devices were now tone generators- Blunote440 sound machines, which were selling faster than they could be produced. The fastest selling version was the trademarked Supernova iPhone. Upon the transfer of power in Washington, the first government directive was to encourage the mass-production of Blunote devices and their distribution to the masses, as a substitute for TV, video games, streaming content, and other forms of high-tech entertainment.
This was a critical step toward keeping the citizens calm and compliant. Because the pharmaceutical giants could no longer produce drugs in mass quantities, due to processor reliant factories still shuttered, all manner of medications were no longer available. The depressed and anxious were manic and dangerous as they descended deeper into madness. Diabetics and the diseased endured a hellish path of suffering. All manner of malady, previously kept in check by modern medicine and drugs, brought misery and death to the masses. In a nutshell, it could be said that mankind was experiencing a sea change, a re-set, a forced adaptation to appalling and horrific circumstances brought on by a cosmic twist of fate- Blunote440.
The disgraced Democratic Party bosses held a wake after the election in the Russian Tea Room, a legendary destination in New York City. The shamed ex-president expounded to his cohorts, “It was a rigged election for criminy sakes. The voters were distracted and their judgment was clouded by Blunote, which as we all know was created to taint and influence the election.” The others at the table sat in silence, eyes rolling about in confusion, wondering if they’d heard him correctly. The party patriarch and mastermind Barack gently chastised him by saying, “Come now Joey, chin up, we’ll roll with it and roll right back to power next time around.”
“It’s just not fair.” the ex-president lamented. “We know they’ll wreck things and dismantle and discard all the advances we’ve made in gender understandings, identity studies, equality strivings, empathy schooling, and our fairness to all in need doctrines. Principles we all know make for good democrats. But with blunote interference wrecking the economy we couldn’t finesse the votes by promising bling. Without the sympathetic media and electronic voting machines the decks were stacked against us. We never had a chance!” he finished, then hoisted his pint.
The commander-in-chief lost no time moving back into the White House. “I’ve ordered our military to hunt down and neutralize, with all expedience, the predators and bad hombres who’ve terrorized our people for too long. The generals have been given a comprehensive task list to execute immediately. I’ve also ordered the summary seizing and deportation of all undocumented and suspicious aliens within our borders. The martial law declared by our predecessors gives me that power. Show me your papers. No papers, no partying on the government dime. They will be swiftly deported!”
“I’ve ordered the construction of vast labor camps, situated in the remotest reaches of our great land, yet strategically placed to facilitate the removal of vital natural resources. We shall empty the prisons and jails and put criminals in those camps to do hard labor. Indeed my friends, we’re bringing back the chain gangs for the deadbeats, in order to re-educate them and teach them our civilized ways. Our law-abiding citizens will once again enjoy crime-free strolls down their boulevards. A new day in America awaits us!”
The threat of nuclear war evaporated as the scientists determined that there was no longer a way to launch, arm, and detonate such sophisticated weapons. They were all too reliant on microprocessors so were quickly scrapped by the nuclear powers. The New York Times ran the headline, “No More Nuclear Nightmares!!!” All across the planet, from the streets of Moscow to the hills of Kentucky, the people rejoiced. It was part of a magical journey the entire planet was embarking on, thanks to the siren song of Blunote440, which continued it’s stoic ticking.
CP Butchvarov 2023
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